the dark web

"The desert wears… a veil of mystery. Motionless and silent, it evokes in us an elusive hint of something unknown, unknowable, about to be revealed." – Edward Abbey

Clear blue skies stretch ahead, windmills spinning to my right as I roll into Palm Springs. The car’s thermometer reads a perfect 74 degrees—exactly the kind of escape I needed from LA’s so-called winter. – say what you want, but 60 degrees in LA is cold. It just is.

The words, ‘You Have Arrived’ light up on the dashboard. I pull over and take a look around the gated community I’ve found myself in. The buildings around me, all interconnected, seemingly carved out of a red stone of some sort, really leaning into the desert landscape, deeply reminding me of where I am. 

I fire off a quick text and step out of the car, stretching deep to shake off the four-hour drive that should’ve been two. But, of course, I checked Maps at noon, left an hour later, and—like magic— that ETA doubled.

The moment I step outside, the air hits different. Crisp, electric, the kind that wakes up something restless inside me. There’s something about the way this place smells—fresh, alive, like anything could happen. 

Maybe it will.

The moment I bend forward, reaching for my toes, to stretch out my back a deep voice rings out behind me: “Oh hi there.”

I snap back to a standing position and spin around to find a man around 6’1, late forties, little scruffy with an impressive gym body.

“Marky Mark,” I say with a smile. Mark grins at me as he slips his arms around my waist and pulls me in for a subtle, quick yet still intimate kiss. 

“How are you, baby boy?” 

Mark holds me, his gaze locking onto mine—intense, unrelenting, penetrating me deeper than most men ever have anally. He’s like a raw, exposed nerve—hypersensitive, always reaching, always craving more.

I can’t relate.